DON’T OPEN TILL CHRISTMAS is a mean-spirited and fun little Santa Slasher that lacks a fair amount of suspense. If a man dressed as Santa is seen walking around alone in this movie, one can assume that he’s going to be killed very soon, and then at some point, someone is going to discover his body. In this case, the person who finds a dead Santa is a rock singer, Caroline Munro (playing herself), while looking smoking hot of course. A vision of sheer ‘80s glamor, she works the stage of London’s Piccadilly Theatre, singing a catchy synth-pop tune, “I’m the Warrior of Love” while serving a shimmering red sequined lewk. It’s an occasion-ready dress, one that can transition easily from the stage to some fabulous holiday party. The crew neck long-sleeved dress fits like a glove and is endowed with subtle shoulder padding. Her waist is cinched by a red V-shaped belt that enhances the curves of her form-fitting dress. Everything glitters, shimmers, and sparkles; even her voluminous, teased-to-high-heaven hair!